Resistance Is Fertile.

by on February 15, 2013

On the other side of Resistance and Procrastination and not-feeling-like-it, is nothing less than everything you’ve ever wanted.

“Like a magnetized needle floating on a surface of oil, Resistance will unfailingly point to true North – meaning that calling or action it most wants to stop us from doing.

We can use this. We can use it as a compass.

Rule of thumb: The more important a coall or action is to our soul’s evolution, the more Resistance we will feel toward pursuing it.” ~ Steven Pressfield, The War of Art
.

I have to admit, I wrestled a bit with this. Resistance

The idea of using Resistance, even (gasp) welcoming it, seemed in direct contradiction to everything I know about the Law of Attraction.

I mean, how does that view of Resistance align with alignment?

What happened to ‘going with the flow’ and ‘everything becomes easy when you’re doing what you’re meant to do’?

And if it (whatever it might be) really is what I want, why is there Resistance at all?

I’ve realized it’s not my Best Self that’s feeling this resistance.

The one who’s resisting is the woman I am now.

My current self.

The one I want to change.

My current self doesn’t do yoga in the morning without fail, even when she goes to bed promising herself she will.

My current self eats too much sugar and hates (certain bits of) her body.

On the other side of Resistance is my Best Self.

That woman does yoga daily, eats well and loves herself unconditionally.

But it’s not just what she does.

It’s who she is.

That is a woman with a yoga practice.

That is a woman with a growing coaching clientele and a burgeoning speaking career.

That is a woman who writes her blog posts, cooks dinner, moves the hearts of strangers.

Not because she must, or should.

But because that’s what a woman like her does.

(Do you get that subtle distinction, dahling?)

On the other side of my Resistance is that woman.

Each time I showed up, put up and did the work, I conquered Resistance and became that woman.

Every morning that I laid out my yoga mat at the foot of my bed, and breathed into the first sun salutation, I became that woman.

With each vegetarian-dinner-success, each bit of dusting done before it was needed, each household chore reframed, I became that woman.

As I delved and dove into my coaching training, honing my skills and clarifying mission, message and mindset, I became that woman.

As I guided, prodded, mirrored and moved my coaching clients into their most luscious lives, I became that woman.

Until, as I realized over my coffee this morning …

The woman I am now is that woman.

 

Of course, this doesn’t mean that there’ll be no more Resistance.

No such luck.

Resistance is implacable, intractable, relentless.

It’s sole purpose is to maintain the status quo, keep the normal, stifle growth. When Resistance wins, so does mediocrity and could-have-beens and regret. When Resistance wins, the mortality rate of dreams goes up another notch.

I expect I’ll probably wage this battle again and again as I move through “what is” into “what’s possible”, but oh, how different it is now.

The woman I am now is equipped, educated, empowered.

It’s not that I’ve conquered Resistance or even that I’ve stopped resisting it.

I’ve discovered that Resistance is FERTILE.

The woman I am now  knows that Resistance is simply a road sign to where she needs to go, a flashy distracting billboard that says,

“Here’s your inspiration. Here’s what matters. Here’s your UNcomfort Zone.

Go THAT Way Instead.”

The woman I am now is not afraid to be uncomfortable if it leads to growth.

The woman I am now is disciplined, determined and utterly delighted with herself.

 

Welcome to my new world, darling heart.

It’s going to get juicy round here.

 

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{ 31 comments… read them below or add one }

Alex February 15, 2013 at 7:20 pm

Every now and again a post comes along that just ‘makes sense’
When that same post is written in such a way to remind me how malleable and beautiful the English language is, well it just makes my day.

Thankyou for sharing your perspective, but more importantly; thank you for wrapping it in such eloquence.

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Jacqueline Gates February 15, 2013 at 7:32 pm

And thank you, kind sir, for such a delicious compliment ~ you totally made my day too.

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Laura Morris February 15, 2013 at 7:47 pm

Ah yes!!!

I feel you!! I understand totally! What a wonderful shift for you to flow into Jacqui. Resistance is something that almost makes life sludgy, noisy and cluttered. Mediocrity SUCKS…I can relate! I read something recently about confronting it head on, looking at it and acknowledging it’s there. I see you’ve done that, and it’s opened the flood gates for much beauty, change and greatness to emerge. Just BE with it, and allow it come on OUT. It’s alright dear heart, I know that you know that. I am proud of you! You certainly helped me… Growth is such a fantastic journey isn’t it?!!
Would love to connect!

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Jacqueline Gates February 16, 2013 at 3:52 pm

I absolutely knew you’d totally get it, oh Limitless One.

And yes, growth is an epic adventure!!

Bliss-ings and love
g aka J

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Clay Franklin February 15, 2013 at 8:47 pm

Wow, you just told me exactly what I needed to hear just now. I love the way you eloquently stated how “going with the flow” dosen’t get me to the gym or off making bank deposits more often. sitting at the computer may be the resistance and the TV may be the path of least resistance. But a “couch potato” I am not. Am I? Well at least now I have a better understanding of my current self Ouch! and my who my Best Self is and what a person like me does or at least does more of and less of.
Thanks so much for the inspirational message.
I fell like sharing it with everyone I know because it is so “awesome and true”
@ClayFranklin

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Jacqueline Gates February 16, 2013 at 3:49 pm

It took me soooo long to get a handle on the subtleties of this distinction, sir Clay.

Everything I’ve studied in the Law of Attraction says that nothing should be hard and when you’re following your bliss, everything’s easy etc, etc, etc.
But like you said, if my bliss involves a flat tummy and cute bum, then then following my bliss by parking on the couch watching football isn’t going to get me there.

I’ve come to the conclusion that “Disciplined Inspiration” is the path to life-yumminess. Hold onto the inspiration and be disciplined in taking action on it – even when, and especially when Resistance shows up.

Thanks for visiting, sir Clay, and do feel free to share widely and often!

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Suzie Cheel February 16, 2013 at 12:11 am

I love this post and I reread it as if it was written for me- I love tour idea of resistance being a fertile playing ground, Such a great way to overcome procrastination.
Thank you for your beautiful words so eloquently expressed 🙂

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Jacqueline Gates February 16, 2013 at 3:44 pm

I love how y’all are picking up on my play with words *happy sigh*
I thought it would be too flowery and ‘literary’ a style for blogging and it’s so good to be proven wrong.

Thanks for visiting, ms Suzie.

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Chery Schmidt February 16, 2013 at 3:11 pm

Hi Jacqueline Gates It is very nice to meet you! I am in the process of change, overcoming a few different things that I have been doing in the past! I have set a new goal and yes it is going to be hard because of my past habits BUT I will get through my “UNcomfort Zone” as you say. I have written this down “UNcomfort Zone” Two Great Words! I am also going to share this post with a few team members. I am so happy I found your message today. The beginning of A New Me! I am that Women! Equipped, Educated & Empowered! Thank you so much for sharing… Chery 🙂

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Jacqueline Gates February 16, 2013 at 3:55 pm

And this goddess is utterly delighted to meet you too, gorgeous Chery.

I love that my words resonated with you … it’s amazing the power in our language, right?

Please feel free to share it with anyone you feel would get something from it, and don’t forget, there’s always more lusciousness sent to the luvlies on my list! (The opt-in box is on the right!)

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Jacs Henderson February 16, 2013 at 3:31 pm

Very interesting Jacqueline, I like this – you have shown that where the resistance lies – that is where we should be. Absolutely love the ‘that woman’ concept – I can see ‘that woman’ in my daily life!!!
Fab post, thanks 🙂
Jacs

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Jacqueline Gates February 16, 2013 at 3:43 pm

Thanks, Jacs.

The more you can see ‘that woman’, the more real she becomes, until you can’t tell you apart.
And that’s when the lusciousness begins.

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Tracey Hausel February 18, 2013 at 8:41 am

Jacqui, you said so eloquently what each of us has to remember. We’re pushing our selves out of our comfort zones so that we can become the person we’re meant to be.

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Jacqueline Gates February 19, 2013 at 11:29 am

TRACEEEEEEEYY!! *huge hugs*
So glad to see you, girlfriend. Living proof of the success that’s possible when you make yourself UNcomfortable.
(Look at all the things we’re doing now, with EASE, that we only dreamed of on that weekend in CT)

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Suzanne Reilley February 18, 2013 at 12:03 pm

Yeeeeessssssss!! Perfect post. It’s amazing how the most insurmountable of goals become possible via the 10,000 little (major) decisions made throughout each day. It’s done by observing the compass of resistance and then by, not smashing it with a hammer, but by washing over it and eroding little pieces like water over stone…over and over, with as much consistency as we can handle, until we become the person we want to be.

Suzanne
howtolose-20pounds.com

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Jacqueline Gates February 19, 2013 at 11:27 am

Suzanne, I know you totally get this … it’s the best way to lose 20 lbs too, right?!

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Suzanne Reilley February 20, 2013 at 5:39 pm

Absolutely! Rather than forcing yourself to lose xx number of pounds in a few months, you ‘become’ a new version of yourself. A person who walks, talks and eats like a slim, happy person. Someone who exercises (for any number of different reasons) regularly. Someone who has more confidence, moves with power and comes from a whole different place.

It’s not easy by any means, but it’s more doable than a lot of people think and it’s so worth the effort.

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Meg February 19, 2013 at 8:09 pm

I love the distinction between my Best Self and the woman I am now that makes so much sense. When resistance I need to step us as my “best self” and push the woman I am now aside and say “excuse me I coming through”!!!

Just love you posts Jacqui

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Kellie Hosaka @social network marketing February 20, 2013 at 2:10 pm

Aloha Jacqui,

Yes, that’s it! I love the quote “The more important a call or action is to our soul’s evolution, the more Resistance we will feel toward pursuing it.” ~ Steven Pressfield. And you have done a great job at that! Such a fascinating journey!!

Thank you for sharing your journey so openly with us! You are truly an inspiration to all.

Much love,
Kellie 🙂

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Susan February 21, 2013 at 12:42 pm

where do the profile images come from in the comments of your posts?

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Jacqueline Gates February 24, 2013 at 3:05 pm

Ms Susan, you’ll need to fill out a profile on Google plus, or Wordpress or FB, and then use that to sign in when you comment. If your bio has a pic of you, it’ll come up as the avatar.

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Susan February 21, 2013 at 12:43 pm

do the profile images come from wordpress.com?

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Jacqueline Gates February 24, 2013 at 3:05 pm

There ya go!

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Coralie February 23, 2013 at 5:30 pm

Amazing blog post love the way you took us on a journey while also affirming your own journey giving you a bit more accountablity to keep up that yoga and eating well. Thank you for sharing I will be back for more 🙂

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Kyron February 25, 2013 at 4:35 am

Lovely post Jacqui, and I can very well relate with what you are trying to explain. I think resistance is always there, whatever we want to do in life, there is this inherent resistance which stops you, telling you to have that burger or stop working. But I believe if we are firmly determined to achieve what we want in life, nothing can become a problem.

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Diane Clark February 27, 2013 at 3:56 am

Ah, those inner conflicts are so familiar to me))
Really interesting ideas on resistance. That’s a fresh perspective on not going with the flow. Thanks for sharing it – you gave me some food for thought.

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Jessica February 28, 2013 at 4:46 am

Very interesting Jacqueline, I like this – you have shown that where the resistance lies – that is where we should be.Thank you so much for sharing!!!!!!!

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Shitij March 1, 2013 at 2:28 pm

A perfect post and glad you mentioned Yoga too and will be recommending this post in my circles too…:D

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Nathalie Villeneuve March 5, 2013 at 5:47 pm

What an awesome post. OMG I can truly recognize myself in what you are saying about resisting. I guess that is because we are human and deep down, we are all very much similar.

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Cassie November 21, 2013 at 3:31 pm

It’s so funny how we find what we need when we need it. I thought this was your post from today because it’s what I needed. Oh wait, it’s from February. I love it and I love this post. Thanks. It’s just what I needed today.
Cassie´s last blog post ..7 Tips for Staying In Attraction Mode

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Iyabo Onipede August 1, 2016 at 10:56 pm

I never saw it that way!!!! Woah!!! Got it. Thanks.

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