The Value of Stepping Back

by on August 22, 2008

*** This is also a repeat of my Boundless Living blog, posted on August 7th.
A lot has happened since then, so there’ll be two blog posts today, to get you up to date. ***

I have been somewhat out of sorts of late, which is why there’ve been no posts for a few days. Not exactly depressed, just a little down, a little tired, a little small. You know the feeling? Just wanting to be left along to find a warm spot with your journal and a pen and a hot cup of tea. Where no-one can bother you. Or expect anything of you.

But the World won’t let you be. There are dinners to be cooked, jobs to be done, and businesses to grow. All things you’ve taken on yourself. And it’s just so distracting when all you want to do is wander through the far reaches of your soul to find out why your seemingly perfect life is somewhat …… unsatisfying? Is that the right word?

Don’t get me wrong, I am deeply grateful for my current life – thankful to my very core – and yet there is still this nagging discontent. A persistent, irritating feeling that I should be, do and have more. I just know that I am capable of, desiring of, and yes dammit, deserving of much more. There, I said it. Does that make me greedy? If the Universe is a catalog as Joe Vitale says, am I allowed to order from every page?

I regularly end up like this. I take on a Challenge, run at it full tilt, spreading myself ever more thinly until I crumple and disintegrate like wet tissue paper.

So, instead of pushing against it and forcing my way through, which is what I would usually do, I took some advice from Kelly (a fellow Challenger) and tried the Sedona Method. It just seemed so simple. Just allow (there’s that word again!) the feeling to surface, and release it.

No judgement.
No criticism for being ungrateful/greedy/undeserving/a disappointment/a phony.

Just a few gentle questions,
a brief silence,
a deep breath,
and then,
and then,
a soul-flood of Peace.

I’m gonna be OK.

And while my Challenge may not be reached in the allotted 45 days, due to the temporary detour into the slow lane,
I am going to get there.
And the timing will be just right.

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