What Would You Like To Stop Doing?

by on March 12, 2012


More often than not, we focus on the DOING  ~
the actions we should/would/could be taking that will improve the lusciousness of life in one arena or another.

But the STOPPING of something ….

That can take way more effort and attention and yet it’s so downplayed.

Except for the really big stuff, like stopping smoking/drinking/eating-Cheezits-till-your-fingers-turn-yellow,
not doing something seems sort of easier, a cop out almost.

And yet to ‘stop doing’ is so much more sensible.

As my muse and unofficial mentor Danielle LaPorte says so succinctly,

“When someone has the good sense and conviction to stop doing what’s not working for them,
well, it calls for a national holiday.”

We’re all so very busy, and the idea of adding more stuff on –
be it affirmations, meditation, decluttering, working out, whatever –
can be overwhelming before we even start.

How about we NOT do stuff that isn’t serving us, so that we can free up morsels of time to do the things that DOES.

So in the spirit of absolute, honest-to-God, you-get-what-you-see authenticity,
(gulp) here’s my list …

  • I’d like to stop eating when I’m not hungry, because it really makes no difference to the starving children in Africa, despite what my mother told me;
  • I’d like to stop automatically correcting other people’s bad grammar, especially out loud;
  • I’d like to stop thinking that I need more information/training/credentials before I can launch that product;
  • I’d like to stop comparing myself to that bendy girl in yoga who can scratch her eyebrows with her toes, backwards;
  • I’d like to stop multi-tasking.

How about you, angel?

What would you like to stop doing?

And how would it help?

Remember what Einstein said,

“Insanity is doing the the same thing over and over again, and expecting different results.”

You, my angel, are a glorious, scrumptious, indescribably powerful being.
How about you stop doing what dims your light?

Luscious Goddess-y Challenge!

I’ve been frightfully brave posted a list of things I’m going to stop doing ~ with a focus on the first and last ones.

I challenge you to choose ONE THING that you’re determined to stop doing, and post it here.

I promise to love and support and cheer you on,
and I bet all the other visitors will do the same.

Bliss-ings,

 

 

 

 

 

 

PS This post was in answer to Danielle’s Burning Question series. Clickety click to see the post that prompted it.

PPS

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{ 49 comments… read them below or add one }

Nancy Shields March 12, 2012 at 4:23 pm

Okay scrumptious one – you want to know what I want to stop doing –

Can I tell you that I want to start drinking more water since I am pretty content with things in my life right now and when things don’t serve the higher purpose I usually have no problem in not doing them.

So here’s to drinking more water for my health,
Nancy
Nancy Shields´s last blog post ..WHAT’S REAL???

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Jacqueline Gates March 13, 2012 at 9:39 pm

I love how contented you are, girlfriend.
Your unencumbered, gypsy, soul-free lifestyle is something I’d adore should my path ever turn that way.

But I agree, the minimum 8 glasses of water per day is non-negotiable if you want to stay dewy and blossoming for years and years!
Cheers, gorgeous one!
*raises a goblet of water in your direction*

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Cathy Miller March 12, 2012 at 6:28 pm

Since this is Lent, I am already supposed to stop doing something. 🙂

One I work on every day of my life and would hope others would join me is to stop judging. Who am I to say what’s fashionable or right or whatever?
Cathy Miller´s last blog post ..7 Business Time-Saving Tips

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Jacqueline Gates March 13, 2012 at 9:31 pm

Hmmm … I think we’re hardwired to judge, it used to be a survival mechanism. But if we could just be more ALLOWING (not tolerant, that implies resistance) then we’d all be much happier I reckon.

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Nichole@funny picture March 12, 2012 at 8:02 pm

After I originally commented I appear to have clicked the -Notify me when new comments
are added- checkbox and now whenever a comment is added I get 4 emails with the same comment.

There has to be a way you can remove me from that service?
Thank you!

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Jacqueline Gates March 13, 2012 at 9:40 pm

There should be an unsubscribe link at the bottom of those emails, Nichole.

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Gail March 12, 2012 at 8:23 pm

Love your post! I would LOVE to stop questioning why I am still single!!!

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Jacqueline Gates March 13, 2012 at 9:29 pm

Then STOP, angel heart, and start focusing on making space for a new companion.
Make room in your closet, space on the counter for another toothbrush, that kind of thing.
“Act as if, and go as though”

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Gaelach March 12, 2012 at 8:46 pm

Oh, there are sooo many things I want to stop doing. Multi-tasking is high on my list, as is doubting myself or tearing myself down. Probably the MOST important thing right now, though, is to stop rationalizing myself away from following my intuition!
Gaelach´s last blog post ..Musing Mondays: Women’s Archetypes

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Jacqueline Gates March 13, 2012 at 9:42 pm

Gaelach, I’m so with you there! Following my intuition – my inner voice – is my theme for this year and the changes have been monumental!

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Petrea March 12, 2012 at 8:55 pm

I want to stop trying to do so many things in one day and take a deep breath- it will still be there tomorrow and it never gets all done! As usual, easier said than done, slowly I am training myself to wind down and relax about it.
Petrea´s last blog post ..Week-End Reflection

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Jacqueline Gates March 13, 2012 at 9:07 pm

Dearest Petrea, it’s an ongoing exercise, but so SO worthwhile.
*hugs*

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Kristen March 12, 2012 at 9:06 pm

I would like to stop saying “yes” to everything. I need to stop doing everything that people ask me to do!
Kristen´s last blog post ..STRESS STORIES: I Quit My Job and Started a Business

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Kellie Hosaka @home business residual income March 12, 2012 at 10:17 pm

Aloha Jacqui!

Thank you for having the courage to list your 5 things you want to stop doing! Congratulations on “leading by example” and BEing an inspiration to so many of us!

To answer your question, the one thing I am determined to stop doing is to “catch my mind chatter which doesn’t serve me”, within 10 minutes of feeling “not quite in-flow”. I will stop everything and quiet my mind, re-connect, and allow.

Thank you for allowing me to declare this on your blog.

Much love & gratitude,
Kellie 🙂
Kellie Hosaka @home business residual income´s last blog post ..Different Types Of Income According To Robert Kiyosaki

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Jacqueline Gates March 13, 2012 at 9:03 pm

That’s also one of my major hangups, Ms Kellie.
It’s so easy to let the negative chatter spiral out of control until one finds oneself down and miserable.
I love the idea of a “time out” to quiet my mind, reconnect and allow.

You are so wise, dear one.

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Jeanine Byers @ Seasonal Color Analysis March 12, 2012 at 10:20 pm

I’d like to stop thinking that I’ll be MORE brilliant after the NEXT training/credential and stand on and in the knowledge and power I have right now. New training becomes a fun possibility, not a must-have!
Jeanine Byers @ Seasonal Color Analysis´s last blog post ..The Quest for an Easter Dress, Part Two

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Jacqueline Gates March 13, 2012 at 5:09 pm

Jeanine, we are two peas in a pod, girlfriend!
I’ve been caught in that trap soooo long too.

Here’s to “standing in and on the knowledge and power we have right now”

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Kate B. March 12, 2012 at 10:43 pm

Hello, Jacqui..

After reading your blog, one question popped into my mind. What if the thing that I need to stop doing is something that is helping me in my life like work?

Well, honestly, I feel worked-up, stressed out. Maybe I should do a little DE-cluttering perhaps?

But there’s one thing in your list that hit me – grammar checking other people. 🙂
I should stop doing that, been wanting to for a long time. Thanks for the hit!

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Jacqueline Gates March 13, 2012 at 5:07 pm

Kate, to be honest, this goddess believes that a bout of de-cluttering can made a difference in ANY situation!
There’s something about the clarity that flows once you’ve got rid of your crap that makes it easier to think.
Try it.
Here’s a link to my Great DeCluttering Series Day 1

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Samantha Jenkins March 13, 2012 at 6:24 am

This is so true Jacqui. I most want to stop comparing myself to others. It’s an insidious and pesky little habit of mine that I often do without fully realising. It serves me in no way, and I want to stop doing it!

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Jacqueline Gates March 13, 2012 at 4:59 pm

It really doesn’t serve us at all, Samantha, and think how free and self-expressive we would all be if we didn’t hold ourselves up to someone else’s yard stick.

The trouble with comparison-itis is that we tend to compare our behind-the-scenes footage to someone else’s highlight reel.

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Rebecca Woodhead March 13, 2012 at 11:23 am

I’d like to step away entirely from the concept of fitting into anyone else’s vision of who I ‘should’ be but my own. I’ve always stuck to my own vision of me, and it’s served me supremely well, then … for reasons unknown … I let someone else decide who I was for a bit and, frankly, they don’t know me at all and they never got it right, so I’m back to being me and I’m SO glad. I’ve missed me. (((Hugs self))).
Rebecca Woodhead´s last blog post ..Release the Word Nerds!

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Jacqueline Gates March 13, 2012 at 4:55 pm

Oh Bex, isn’t it weird how we do that to ourselves, even when we KNOW we are uniquely, scrumptiously, weirdly NOT like anyone else?

I fell into that trap too ~ hence this year being the Year Of Listening To My Inner Voice.

I missed me too!!

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Marla March 13, 2012 at 12:09 pm

What a perfect post, Jacqui! Beautifully written and so, so wise. I’d like to stop putting other people’s opinions ahead of my own.. especially about MY life! xoxoxoxo
Marla´s last blog post ..Roasted Eggplant with Bruschetta Topping

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Jacqueline Gates March 13, 2012 at 4:54 pm

Aaah, sweet Marla, that EXACT THING has been the focus of my year so far.
Listening to my inner voice, and above all, following its guidance has made all the difference.

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Dionne, the Tea Priestess March 13, 2012 at 5:46 pm

I would like to stop doubting my own abilities. I tend to feel like I need just one more training in order to start sharing myself but I truly have what it takes to start sharing my teachings right now. Any additional trainings I take will just add a luscious icing on my already delicious cake.
Dionne, the Tea Priestess´s last blog post ..Grace and Ease

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Jacqueline Gates March 14, 2012 at 10:56 am

Dionne, I’m soooo with you … we have the same ‘Stop Doing’ desire!
We are brilliant, intuitive and thoroughly trained at what we do … let’s shelve all the need for more training and just START right now!
What do you say?
With me?

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Karina March 14, 2012 at 3:12 am

Gorgeous post, Jacqui! And I love your website : ). I just read more about you and you are one brave woman. And funny too! I am still giggling about the unicorn sign you put up a while ago (hilarious!).

OMG, my big things right now (there are tons on my list ; ) are to stop biting my finger nails (I’ve been doing it since I was like 7… and I’m 38…) and to stop being so obsessed about my work. Petrea, I hear you! My to-do-lists are huge and I keep adding stuff to them.

I feel bad when I don’t work (because there is so much fun stuff I want to do) and I keep saying to my children that I just have to finish one more thing before I can read/play/feed them ; ). When I told my son who is 5 years old that I am sorry that I work so much and don’t spend a lot of time doing fun things with him he said: But it’s great that you work a lot, mummy! Great! You will make lots of money and we can do a lot of fun stuff with it!

Hm… The money part isn’t quite true – yet ; ). He is so sweet though. I’ll stop now…ha, ha!

Big hugs, Karina
Karina´s last blog post ..Gorgeous Guest Blogger: Petrea Hansen Adamidis

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Jacqueline Gates March 14, 2012 at 10:53 am

Karina, you are such a delight!

Maybe you could use a timer to help curtail the working a bit, and give your son a bit more time?
Set it for an hour or whatever time you need to do stuff, and then when it goes off, you STOP.

Let your little man know that when it goes off, he gets your undivided attention.
He’s so understanding, but I’m sure he’d love it!
And you won’t feel guilty …

He’s only little once … grab this time for all it’s worth, mama goddess.
Really, and truly, everything else can wait.

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Jo March 15, 2012 at 2:58 pm

I’d like to stop caring so much what others think of me and not let their new shiny thing make my new shiny thing feel less precious. Which I think boils down to a basic shift from needing outside validation to centering myself in self-worth.

Thank you for asking the tough questions 🙂
Jo´s last blog post ..Create like no-one’s watching

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Joseph@Philadelphia Nightlife March 15, 2012 at 11:26 pm

I would love to quit my job and go into business for myself. I hate working for a company! Your paycheck is regulated. You will eventually cap out (Pay). If you work for yourself you can determine how much money you can make. That’s what I want to stop doing.
Joseph@Philadelphia Nightlife´s last blog post ..Tir Na Nog Bar & Grill

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roxanne March 16, 2012 at 4:10 pm

i laughed out loud when i read the first one on your list ( I’d like to stop eating when I’m not hungry, because it really makes no difference to the starving children in Africa, despite what my mother told me) i.m the same, my mother drummed it into me to eat when i wasnt hungry, and to always finish what what was on my plate, even though my body/stomach said otherwise, reading your post today has made me question myself why i`m still doing it today (40 years on)

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Cristina@hypopnea March 20, 2012 at 10:26 am

Hey Jacqui,

Very interesting discussion you have here. I have a lot on my list but I’ll just give you one thing I’d like to stop doing which is a habit I just recently acquired, and that is online shopping. My husband absolutely hates it! For the past weeks I’ve been purchasing items online, mostly clothes and shoes and he just goes insane when the delivery comes. So yeah, I need to stop that for my husband’s sanity.

– Cristina
Cristina@hypopnea´s last blog post ..Snore Wizard Review

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brian@pizza jokes March 28, 2012 at 1:09 am

Great post and honesty. Here’s a little list of mine.

1) I’d like to stop being angry so much
2) I’d like to not eat so much junk
3) I’d like to stop procrastinating
brian@pizza jokes´s last blog post ..Top Ten Pizza Jokes and Stories

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Holly March 29, 2012 at 6:12 pm

I want to stop being a follower and be a leader!! Which comes down to a whole lot of other things that I am doing that I need to stop doing!! But I will save that for a post over at my blog ( if I can rummage up the courage to spill the beans!!) Fanatastic post Jacquie!!
Holly´s last blog post ..Hooked Into Another Weight Loss Miracle?

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Danica Green@Shopping Bags April 1, 2012 at 6:44 am

I would like to stop myself from overeating.

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Sara April 21, 2012 at 12:09 am

I want to stop blurting things out at inopportune times! I will randomly say something not pertaining to the conversation at all, it is weird. May I just say here, THANK YOU for quoting Einstein. It has been floating around that this is the actual definition of insanity. Keep up the amazing posts!
Sara´s last blog post ..The Best Climbing Plants For Wooden Arbors

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Jacqueline Gates May 1, 2012 at 2:09 pm

You made me smile, Sara. I love people who speak first and think after lol

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Scott H. @Investing Blog April 24, 2012 at 12:28 pm

How about stop wasting time? I don’t want to be always busy but when I am busy I would like my efforts to be more concentrated and to the point. I have been working hard to stamp out just being busy for the sake of being busy without getting things done. There are several strategies to accomplish this which I have been implementing.

First, writing things down is important. If it is written down you are far more likely to act on it. Plus it gives direction. The second is accomplishing those goals first and foremost. I have heard of bloggers waking up at 6 AM to work until noon then they are done for the day. During that time they get a post in, do some backlinking (commenting), social sharing, send and reply to emails, and some daily SEO. That is the ultimate goal, to be up early, motivated and focused.
Scott H. @Investing Blog´s last blog post ..Jim Cramer’s Stock Picks – Mad Money & His Investing History

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Jacqueline Gates May 1, 2012 at 2:06 pm

Getting up at 6am does not sound at all appealing to this goddess lol,
but I do love the idea of getting started earlier in my day, and remaining motivated and focused throughout.
Doesn’t happen every day, but definitely more and more as I align myself fully with my purpose and passion.

Thanks for visiting, Scott

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Jacob April 26, 2012 at 8:12 am

I’m not sure if this is relevant… but I would like to stop building links for my websites as it is very hard work which takes a lot of time and is very tedious… important for my SEO but hard nonetheless… easy when I get to read a nice blog like yours though 🙂
Jacob´s last blog post ..Revitol Rosacea Treatment Cream

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Steve June 14, 2012 at 5:43 am

I’d like to stop thinking too much on other’s problems and not on my ones.
I’d like to stop staring every hot girl around me.
I’d like to stop or at least reduce swearing.

Those are the most important 3 “I’d like to stops” currently in my life. It’d be interesting to see the other side of this: What would you like to do more?

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andrew July 3, 2012 at 7:31 am

Perfect post.There are soon many things i want to do stop ? Doubting my own abilities Talk to others without respect,Minimize multitasking work.Thank you for asking the tough questions

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Lollu Sabha July 7, 2012 at 3:18 am

I’m NOT going to stop reading your blog 🙂
Lollu Sabha´s last blog post ..English

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Ben September 19, 2012 at 6:13 am

I’d like to stop drinking the wrong things! Too much caffeine, too much alcohol, not enough water and wholesome juices.

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Mei Mayore@Canada Life Insurance Quotes September 30, 2012 at 11:50 am

I would like to stop minding those negative people who would always want to pull me down and sees only the bad in me. Moreover, I want to stop doubting myself.
Mei Mayore@Canada Life Insurance Quotes´s last blog post ..COMPARE LIFE INSURANCE QUOTES

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Elaine Salt@Rental Property Management October 6, 2012 at 5:04 am

If there is one thing that I would like to stop doing at this point of my life is to stop punishing myself from doing the wrong decisions I have made in the past.

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Ann Sherman November 19, 2013 at 8:55 pm

I want to stop procrastinating, doubting myself, and staying stuck (and your articles are already helping!). Thank you! We’ve been Facebook friends for awhile, but I read one of your articles (which quickly became several) for the first time today, and it feels like I have a friend in my corner. Yay! 🙂

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Jacqueline Gates November 29, 2013 at 5:39 pm

Aaah I’m so glad, Ann. Thank you for visiting. And do chat on FB, won’t you?

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