I wrote this in honour of ThrowbackThursday on Facebook. You can join in the conversation here.
Dahlinks, may I present The Recent Hair Evolution.
Actually, it’s been rather fascinating to me to see myself actualize through this “montage”.
In the first one, I was feeling very Venus, almost timeless.
I loved how I looked and yet my insides kept squeaking,
“You’re not this anymore.”
An incredibly irritating message when you still don’t know what this is.
I took the second one at the hair salon, minutes before I sat down in the stylist’s chair, to have 8″ of history lopped off.
I was soooo nervous (you can see it, yea?) and yet deeply determined.
I’d changed sooo much over the past 7 years.
(Helllooo, Uranus in Aries transit!)
We’d downsized by nearly two thousand square feet; moved to 5 different places – each one an outside reflection of an inside ‘decluttering’ of societal norms and age-related expectations.
We’d become grandparents – something that had me reexamining everything about why-and-what I’m building.
I’d unraveled, unknotted and re-knit my Knowing, my message and my mission.
I had contemporized myself – shedding years of habits and beliefs that’d kept me in a holding pattern of this-always-worked-so-I’ll-keep-doing-it.
That’s not growth. That’s stagnation, even when it looks “classic” or “timeless”.
I had to get my outsides to reflect my current insides.
Or I knew that what I saw in the mirror would pull be back into Who-I-Used-To-Be.
I wasn’t brave enough yet to go as short as I wanted.
But 8″ of hair came off.
And it felt like shedding an exoskeleton.
Three months later, I cut it again. Getting shorter. Braver.
Played with curls …
and a rediscovered glamour.
I felt the same excitement as I did at every First Dress Rehearsal I’d ever had in my 25 years on stage.
Slowly, the wardrobe/makeup/hair was coming together.
Slowly I was beginning to SEE my Next Self in the mirror.
Still my insides whispered incessantly,
Last week, I went shorter still.
Asymmetrical – which, for a Libra is revolutionary lol
Almost too short to curl but still deeply glam.
More sure of myself.
Finally, my insides are quietly satisfied.
We’re in sync.
Ready for what’s next.